F*&! Joe Torre

Since Joe Torre breaks our hearts, this blog will break his balls. Every day of the season I will detail the errors, misjudgements, and omissions that make him the most overrated manger in the history of the game (even more than Tommy Lasorda!). But Joe Torre is not just one bum in hero's clothing (i.e. the pinstripes); he is the quintessential counterfeit of excellence, a figure who embodies the triumph of the ersatz that pervades every aspect of our culture. No organization in sport, nay in civilization generally, has manifested a committment to continuing greatness like the New York Yankees, a beacon to all, in every field of endeavor, that the best is always possible. How intolerable is it then that the Yankees should be managed by a mediocrity on stilts, a figure with a reputation for greatness without any of the attributes thereof. Beginning with Torre and ending with Torre, this blog will look to smash idols we create out of inadvertence, ignorance, and complacency.

Saturday, September 15, 2007

THE MARATHON ASIDE,

the most important thing that happened to the Yankees tonight was probably that Cleveland won, LA lost and now they are tied for the second best record in the league. While the Yankees seem to me unlikely to catch the Red Sox, though the latter are one of the most overrated teams in recent memory, they now have a pretty good chance of avoiding the Angels in the opening series (a non-consummation devoutly to be wished).



As for the game itself, a win is a win but that's about the only thing you could say for it (oh, and of course Boston really does suck!). Everything that is wrong with the Yankees was fully on display. The situational hitting was terrible; they left a boatload of guys on against Dice-K, who true to form gave out 4 free passes in addition to several hits. They let him off the hook in the first with the bases jammed and then Jeter swung at ball 4 in the dirt in the sixth, when the walk would have brought in a run, closing the lead to 5-3. Last but not least, when Dice-K began his typical meltdown in the 4th, giving up a lasar double to Posada and a long triple to Matsui, with noone out, Cano and Cabrera saved his ass by repeatedly going out of the zone, just when he was doing his best to mix in some walks with the blasts.



But of course the situational hitting was nothing compared to the glovework. Giambi's miscues were preposterous. The grounder was inexcusable and the dropped throw from Abreu was worse. But the truth is he should have also picked the throw from Jeter in the first, and if he had any sort of an arm, he would have gotten the picked-off Ellsbury on the way to second. Giambi homered for one run, but gave away three. God do I miss andy Phillips. With a ground ball pitcher like Pettite ( or Wang) you need a first baseman who can play the position. I'm not sure I wouldn't have gone with Betamint. Posada was almost as bad by the way. He had two passed balls, he should have had an advancing Pedroia at second, and he seemed out of synch all night. Finally there was good ol' Joe's mismanagement of the bullpen. Can anyone tell me why Sean Henn was in a game that was not already over one way or the other. Now that Veras and Bruney have returned and Vizcaino seems healthy, why is Henn even allowed to dress?



No, the win tonight was more about Boston's troubles than the Yankees' prowess. Oki-Doki is just that with his opponents at this point. I don't think he's tired--he hasn't pitched all that much--but he's becoming familiar. And you know in Japan, where he was really familiar, much weaker hitters were making him look less than sensational the past couple of years. I think he's a novelty act whose novelty is wearing off. As for Papelbon, he's still great, but both Jeter and AROD have shown an abilty to deal with his heater, Jeter by fighting it off (remember game four of the 2006 massacre), Arod by jumping it (remember the GW homer earlier this year). As for Dice-K, his performance, his best in weeks, was vintage Jared Wright: get through 5+, don't get hurt too bad, leave men on base for the relief corps, and stress them to the max. If the Yankees had exercised greater patience, his stats would have been as lackluster as his performance actually was. He too is not tired, hell he was throwing 95 into the 6th and he never throws higher. But he's actually a little like Mussina: a) his out pitches are usually out of the zone (he has more velocity than Moose but his fastball is really flat) so b) he gives up lots of walks to patient line-ups and c) he then gets frustrated and serves up hittable strikes.



I have concentrated on the ills of the Boston staff because that is what was supposed to save them from a diminished line-up. Obviously there is a power outage in New England, especially with Manny on vacation or hiatus or sabbatical or drugs or whatever the hell he is on. Ellsbury looks talented but I can see why he only hit 2 homers all year in AAA. We found out tonight why Drew has sucked so bad all year and I really feel bad for him on that, but the fact remains that he has given and continues to give them no pop whatsoever. Lowell is a better hitter but a lesser slugger than ever--he may not even reach 20 homers let alone the 35 he used to be good for. Varitek is-- as I said last year and again this spring--done, done, done. His last at bat, against Mo, whom he has owned, was nothing short of pathetic. If he played for any other team, and if he wasn't a world-class wanker in any case, I'd pity him for it, or at the least feel guilty for all the shadenfreud I am taking about his descent into sub-mediocrity. As a team, they have to string together lots of hits (or Yankee errors) to score runs, particularly when you do the sensible thing and walk the still dangerous Ortiz (if only for the comedy of watching him try to pull all that steriod enhanced fat around the bases on those steroid damaged wheels). And their singles hitters--Crisp, Lugo, Kielty, Youkilis--are all hitting below, in some cases well below 300. If it weren't for Pedroia to back up against Ortiz and Lowell, this team would have all the offensive explosiveness of the Minnesota Twins.



Well, big day tomorrow. The Tigers try to beat Santana with someone I've never heard of. If the Yankees can put them 5 games down in the loss column with only 14 to play, I think the wild card is sewed up. After all, if the Yankees can just go 7-6 against the Rays, O's and Jays, the Tigers would still have to go 12-2 the rest of the way to tie, and that's presuming the unpresumable, that we lose Sunday to Goehring's nephew.

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