F*&! Joe Torre

Since Joe Torre breaks our hearts, this blog will break his balls. Every day of the season I will detail the errors, misjudgements, and omissions that make him the most overrated manger in the history of the game (even more than Tommy Lasorda!). But Joe Torre is not just one bum in hero's clothing (i.e. the pinstripes); he is the quintessential counterfeit of excellence, a figure who embodies the triumph of the ersatz that pervades every aspect of our culture. No organization in sport, nay in civilization generally, has manifested a committment to continuing greatness like the New York Yankees, a beacon to all, in every field of endeavor, that the best is always possible. How intolerable is it then that the Yankees should be managed by a mediocrity on stilts, a figure with a reputation for greatness without any of the attributes thereof. Beginning with Torre and ending with Torre, this blog will look to smash idols we create out of inadvertence, ignorance, and complacency.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Carl, We Hardly Knew Ye

as anything other than a slacker fuckwad who disgraced himself and the pinstripes. Now that they've decided to shut this malingering bozo down for the season (again), and since they have the 40 man limit, they ought to require him, on pain of voiding his contract, to report for work at Yankee stadium before remaining home games. Upon his appearance, they should suspend the rule against projectiles being hurled onto the field, provided said projectiles evidence a good faith effort to ascertain, in the most painful way imaginable, the truth of the rumors that that this jackass hasn't a backbone, any heart, or a brain in his head.

posted by joe valente | 11:44 PM

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