F*&! Joe Torre: The Order of Things

F*&! Joe Torre

Since Joe Torre breaks our hearts, this blog will break his balls. Every day of the season I will detail the errors, misjudgements, and omissions that make him the most overrated manger in the history of the game (even more than Tommy Lasorda!). But Joe Torre is not just one bum in hero's clothing (i.e. the pinstripes); he is the quintessential counterfeit of excellence, a figure who embodies the triumph of the ersatz that pervades every aspect of our culture. No organization in sport, nay in civilization generally, has manifested a committment to continuing greatness like the New York Yankees, a beacon to all, in every field of endeavor, that the best is always possible. How intolerable is it then that the Yankees should be managed by a mediocrity on stilts, a figure with a reputation for greatness without any of the attributes thereof. Beginning with Torre and ending with Torre, this blog will look to smash idols we create out of inadvertence, ignorance, and complacency.

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

The Order of Things

Huston Street is a great closer but he is an especially tough nut for righthanders. Which brings us to the Yankees batting order. After letting Damon get into scoring position, Street should have had to face Matsui before getting out of the inning. He did not. Why? Because when Torre is not mishandling the bullpen, he's busy failing to maximize the potential of his line-up. The Damon deal gave the Yankees a unique opportunity to put a line up out there that is not only tough top to bottom but is also proofmagainst all platoon specialist relievers. Properly set, the batting order would offer no chance to face to men from the same side of the plate in a row. Here is what the order should look like. Damon (L), Jeter (R), Matsui (L), Rodriguez (R), Giambi (L), Sheffield (R), Cano (L), Williams (B), Posada (B). you would lose the wraparound thing with Cano but it would be more than worth it to get him, rather than Posada, an extra AB every once in a while. Now torre is a guy who in particular situations worries the right/left match-ups. So why doesn't he act on those concerns in the line-up as a whole. Another mystery form the worst field manager ever to secure a reputation for excellence.

Coming Posts: 1. Why Torre no more belongs in the Hall of Fame than Theo Epstein's personal lavatory attendant (oh you say Peter Gammons is in the Hall? Hmmm.)
2. Whatever happened to sound fundamental baseball in the Bronx; or why is Torre channelling Ralph Houk instead of Billy Martin?

1 Comments:

Anonymous said...: And, for the record, it took only until the commercial between innings 3 and 4 of the opening night game for Joe V. to point out how Torre was fucking up the Yankees this season with his poor field managing.; 2:31 PM