F*&! Joe Torre

Since Joe Torre breaks our hearts, this blog will break his balls. Every day of the season I will detail the errors, misjudgements, and omissions that make him the most overrated manger in the history of the game (even more than Tommy Lasorda!). But Joe Torre is not just one bum in hero's clothing (i.e. the pinstripes); he is the quintessential counterfeit of excellence, a figure who embodies the triumph of the ersatz that pervades every aspect of our culture. No organization in sport, nay in civilization generally, has manifested a committment to continuing greatness like the New York Yankees, a beacon to all, in every field of endeavor, that the best is always possible. How intolerable is it then that the Yankees should be managed by a mediocrity on stilts, a figure with a reputation for greatness without any of the attributes thereof. Beginning with Torre and ending with Torre, this blog will look to smash idols we create out of inadvertence, ignorance, and complacency.

Thursday, August 10, 2006

Where Have You gone, Bubba Crosby, Yanks Nation Turns Its Lonely Eyes to You, ooh, ooh, ooh

A few posts ago I conjured up the nightmare scenario should Johnny Damon go down inor near the playoffs, now that Bubba has been sent packing. Well for those of us who got the opportunity to watch the Yankees "scary win" (Z's phrase) tonight, we got a vivid foreshadowing (as my students like to say) After Fahrnsworth contrived to squander 4 runs of a five run lead, and to do so with 2 outs and noone on base, Mo came in to finish off the Sox and preserve the win. After plunking Anderson (on an 0-2 count no less) and putting two men down, Mo pitched to Taguchi with a man on first. Now Damon had been removed in the 4th inning and Bernie was manning (or girling) center field. Taguchi hits one of those bloop flies that Rivera is prone to allow and Bernie tiptoes ever so gingerly toward the descending sphere. He has plenty of time to get there, even moving as slowly as Torre thinks, but he doesn't really take a direct route. He sort of surrounds the fly, uncertain whether his aging legs will carry him to a place where he can field it. At the last minute, it becomes apparent to him that his mincing approach means that he will have to stretch to catch the ball in the air. Stretch mind you, not dive. Still he decides it's not worth the risk, or the effort, and he pulls up short and plays it on the bounce. His throw to Cano is weak enough that the runner had a mind to try and score from first to knot the score, and subsequent replays showed he probably would have made it. He returned to third however and Mo retired the last batter on a nifty play by Cano.

What was obvious to any knowledgeable baseball observer this side of Joe Torre was that Bernie Williams is one of a very few players permitted to roam a major league outfield, and probably the only player given the keys to centerfield who doesn't catch that ball. Bubba not only makes the play, he makes it in such a routine fashion that none of us watching it would have imagined it could be the source of much trouble. This is how designating Bubba could come back to haunt us. I for one am already haunted by the possibility.

3 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yeah, plenty of time for the Sox to catch fire, but they just look so weak these days. their pitching is terrible, and other than Papi and Manny, their lineup isn't scaring anyone. I think they missed their chance to put the Yanks away while they were injured, and now the Sox are injured and the Yanks have got Cano back, picked up Abreu (who's been awesome for them), and might get Hideki back in a few weeks, or else Dotel.

Man, Cano has really picked up right where he left off, starting from the 1st inning of his 1st game back with that throw to third.

11:33 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

not sure why it made that last comment Anonymous--it was me.

11:33 AM  
Blogger joe valente said...

Don't go counting your Dotels before their activated. I just read a quote form torre saying he was more confident that Pavano was coming back than Dotel, which means Dotel must be some kind of mythical creature. Even if Dotel does appear by magic this season, torre says he will have to treat him with kid gloves. I take that to mean Mama joe will not only refuse to play him, but will bring him chicken soup in the dugout.

3:08 PM  

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